Flashback

Today's probably the best day of the year for me (for now at least)... And it thought me alot.. :O... Alot.... and abit of regrets too D: Read on to know about it~♥

First off, I got invited out to Callie's house yesterday for visiting.
So this morning I met up with Stella at Tabuan Plaza.
(cos i dont know Callie's house!) we then went to her house..
talked in the car. got to know my collegemate more :) which is good~
And then at Callie's house, we talked and joked.. blah blah blah
Then we went to Stella's house, With Callie's bf following us (he drove by himself la)
we joked talked and had fun in the car. LOL!
Me n stella felt like bulbs lor! :X
ahem!

anyway! after that, we talked about random stuff.
So to be honest, it felt nice to get a better friendship with my coursemates..
After visiting Stella's house, we went to a random shop, so Stella can hand her car over to her mum. And we used Callie's bf's car to go out for lunch
We went over to 木木小屋. :)
LOL! had my fav there of course~
Choc Milkshake + Lemon Chicken Rice..
LOL! we played 飞机棋 just to waste time and finish our deserts.
Callie lost! xD ahem!

Lol.. I thought 木木小屋 would bring me lots of memories... and to be honest it did..
ALOT! but... it didnt hurt as much as i thought... it just made me miss her.. but nothing more than that... Have I really move on? Not really.. But then.. I learnt that, I dont have to. I just need to cherish the time i had with her. As in for real, the good and bad.. especially when there werent soo many bad parts :\ ..
Anyway! Callie and her bf, poke here and slap there and mess hair with each other, making again~ me and Stella felt like bulbs.... and also trigger some memories for me :\
but i'm happy for them :) its sweet! lol!

Went into class late! OPPS!!
:) but got others later than us! HAH!
anyway... blah blah blah..
Class New Assignment is have to come up with a storyboard by next week for our video. :O
I got stuck in a group with..

Miguel Faylona (Filipino)
Elton De Rozario (I have no idea wat race he is!)
Macurse (Sarawak Local!)
Shaamil (KL Malaysian)
Lai Kian Fatt (Chinese)

So yeah! hoping to have Innovative and Creative and unique ideas in this BIG range of a group :)

anyway..
suan and played around with my mates ==! LOL!
and after class. Chatted with Callie when we were waiting for our ride homes..
And it triggered alot of stuff in me...
But what triggered me most was her sentence about relationships;
Like if her bf doesnt trust her type; she'd just tell him to leave, cos her friends are more important to her..
and talked about all the problems she faced in the past. :)
I never told her mine of course, cos i barely know her..
But I feel like i really made friends today :') which felt good for me.
And it thought me alot... so heres the lowdown.

1) COUSIN WAS WRONG! You Can Make Friends In College. NOT Everyone Are People Users :O

2) I owe Pric an apology.
today I was reminded that I had fun with her regardless of watever relationship me n her had. If we werent serious and hanged out as friends. I think we'd have had the same amount of fun as well. I'm not holding to the past, But i do remember them.
And how i wish i could apologize to her face to face.. but i cant. :\ Or at least not yet..
The thing is, I wasnt being fair to her at all. I guess I never trusted her when I should have.. but events left me unable to trust her.. when the truth was that she really trusted me. And I betrayed her..
My emotions blind me to feeling the one Betrayed.. But I was wrong.. A part of me wish YOU would be reading this here.. But I dont know if she reads my blog anymore. If Friendships are important to her. Than I wanna be her friend.. I can say I dont trust her. But thats a lie.. I do.. Cos I was the one who betrayed her..
Actually the Only real betrayal she did was when she gave me a Late Explanation. I dont hold a grudge against that.. Haiz! I HATE realizing things late!
Like now! I have... alottt... alot of regrets.. I was happy to be just her friends when me n her were friends.. I dont know how all this affected me the way it did.. and it didnt.. I wish I could have another chance.. "I'm sorry I misunderstood you.." is what i wanna say to her soo badly rite now.. but then I have this whole entire life to have a chance to be her friend again! So that's something!

3) I've been watching Matrix lately.. (Cos i was too young to know wat the whole thing was about!) and It Thought Me!

(a) "Decisions are given to those with Power, But Decisions are just an illusion. Because Of Fate; We've Already Made The Choice. The Read Headache About Decisions Are The Reasons WHY We Made Our Choice." :) So because Of This.. I figured the reason out.. I am Emotional. And its what makes me strong. In A Good Way And Bad. I'm not without power, I do have choices. And I've made my choices soo far.. And the Reasons are clear now.. But as far as my heart goes; I want to fix my broken friendship with my sis (if she'd still consider me that)

(b)Reality Is Limited Only Cos Of Our Minds. If We Set Our Minds Free To Imagination, We can Do All Things.

(c) I Freakin' Believe I Can Levitate If I Wanted To! LOL! A Christian Look To This Would Be.. If God Made Man In His Likeness. And Put US In Control Of This World. WE STILL ARE THE ONES WHO CONTROL THIS WORLD. Although The Fruit Of Evil Has Corrupted Us And Made Reality Soo REAL To Us.. The Earth Is Still Ours.. So I'm like thinking, If We Believe It.. We Can Actually Do Anything. Our Corrupted Minds Are The Only Thing Keeping Us From Not Being Able To Do It.. And THAT RIGHT THERE! Is My New Fuel To Doing All Things Without Fear :'D

Heh! Anyway!
That Aside, Life's Been Well Okaye... Tho I've Been Being Eaten Up About V-day..
But The Chat After Class Made Me Felt Better..
I Guess I Should Appreciate What I Have More Than To Want More Than What I Have :'(
I feel really really bad right now.. So Holding On To Chances When I Can Actually Redeem Myself And Not Let It Pass Me By Again~

OHH! Found Out Panic! At The Disco Released Their New Song's Official Video!
Ballad Of Mona Lisa~ Love it!
Mona Lisa! I'd Pay To See You Frown ! :O! ROFL!
Lovin The song :)) So Yeah... All That Boosted My Mood. :D Tho I Regret Alot... :\
I guess.. The reason why I dont like to make friends much and dont trust much is cos I got betrayed by alot when i was young.. I can remember alot of them.. I regret that..
I never treated friendships as anything important after my childhood..
Now then I know lor.. Friends are important.. I wanna.. try.. to make friends..
But I wont trust yet.. I thought Pric was the reason I stopped trusting.. but I guess. I Never actually Trusted anyone.. So Before i actually make great friendships.. I wanna fix one of the greatest friendship i ever had first.

The only thing I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND IS!
Why Didnt Anyone Just Tell Me Straight Out What They Thought About Me? D:
then again.. I guess no one ever actually understood me enough to know. And Probably still dont..

LOL! But I'm Glad I Learn A Lot Today :) ♥