So.. Everyone has their own takes in life.
There are those who find it fitting to be just within the comfort of friends, and those who find solace in the realm of solitude. People who gets lost in their own worlds of books & studies, People who hides away in cyberspace. Hobbyist who takes up hobbies just to cure their emptiness. Oh how we mortals get rooted into this wonderfully materialized world~
TRAGIC~ & a wee bit dramatic.
But what of me? what of me.
Depression has consumed me time n time again.
I may not be crazy enough to cut my own ear off and send it to a lover (Artist, Van Gogh)
nor will i hide in a broken down house away from the world writing poetry (Poet, Edgar Ellen Poe)
No.. I choose to remain here. Altho I'm not seen as much.
And I may possibly just seem like a Ghost to the people around me.
I remain.. here... in silence.
I'm appreciated; Not.
I'm loved; Not.
I'm Walking, Talking, Breathing, But Am I Alive?
years of solitude and rejection has caused me a hole in my chest.
an emptiness.. a gap that nothing in this world can ever fill!
I have tried over and over. In every single possibly way to fill it.
But it remains... the hole remains.
is love what i'm after? is happiness what i need?
is a companion all i want? is life worth living.... ?
no no no no no NONONONONO!!?!
no... I've waited, I've ran, I've fallen, I've practiced, I've trained, I've cried, I've died, I've been revived. I've been broken, I've been fixed, I've been ill, I've been healed, But still this emptiness remains.
Years and years this emptiness remains.
A depression that I cant seem to break.
why why why why WHY?!
Life is not unfair, in fact, my life is getting better and better.
I get blessed almost daily, I have every reason to be happy.
I've had probably a life with a lot more experiences than others.
but still... still...
I cant find what i'm looking for..
Is there nothing to fill this gap?
Is this world soo limited that a hole cannot be filled?
ahahax..
..
I wanna be loved. I wanna be appreciated, I wanna be noticed.
I wanna... be... Happy...
tired of being alone, tired of trying, tired..
oh soo tired...
If there is truly nothing for me in this world..
I really dont know why I'm still going..
will waiting really be all I'm suppose to do?
I'm really sick of it. soo sick... of waiting.
I dont even know what i'm waiting for..
and if y'all think this is Emotional, than F U .
Cos its my blog and its suppose to be personal.
If u wanna judge than say it to my face, dont gossip!
ahahax...
Torment..Sacrifice..God..Love..Life..Earth..World..Relationship..Friendship..Depression..Self-harm..Myself..You..Everyone..Hate..Disappointment..Unreliable..Insecure..Unsafe.....Broken... Dead... Empty...
Why'd you have to leave me falling down this bottomless pit? I'm an angel, I'm suppose to sore in the skies, free, with no chains, no limits.. Not falling with burned off wings and broken bones..
.:FORSAKEN:.
There are those who find it fitting to be just within the comfort of friends, and those who find solace in the realm of solitude. People who gets lost in their own worlds of books & studies, People who hides away in cyberspace. Hobbyist who takes up hobbies just to cure their emptiness. Oh how we mortals get rooted into this wonderfully materialized world~
TRAGIC~ & a wee bit dramatic.
But what of me? what of me.
Depression has consumed me time n time again.
I may not be crazy enough to cut my own ear off and send it to a lover (Artist, Van Gogh)
nor will i hide in a broken down house away from the world writing poetry (Poet, Edgar Ellen Poe)
No.. I choose to remain here. Altho I'm not seen as much.
And I may possibly just seem like a Ghost to the people around me.
I remain.. here... in silence.
I'm appreciated; Not.
I'm loved; Not.
I'm Walking, Talking, Breathing, But Am I Alive?
years of solitude and rejection has caused me a hole in my chest.
an emptiness.. a gap that nothing in this world can ever fill!
I have tried over and over. In every single possibly way to fill it.
But it remains... the hole remains.
is love what i'm after? is happiness what i need?
is a companion all i want? is life worth living.... ?
no no no no no NONONONONO!!?!
no... I've waited, I've ran, I've fallen, I've practiced, I've trained, I've cried, I've died, I've been revived. I've been broken, I've been fixed, I've been ill, I've been healed, But still this emptiness remains.
Years and years this emptiness remains.
A depression that I cant seem to break.
why why why why WHY?!
Life is not unfair, in fact, my life is getting better and better.
I get blessed almost daily, I have every reason to be happy.
I've had probably a life with a lot more experiences than others.
but still... still...
I cant find what i'm looking for..
Is there nothing to fill this gap?
Is this world soo limited that a hole cannot be filled?
ahahax..
..
I wanna be loved. I wanna be appreciated, I wanna be noticed.
I wanna... be... Happy...
tired of being alone, tired of trying, tired..
oh soo tired...
If there is truly nothing for me in this world..
I really dont know why I'm still going..
will waiting really be all I'm suppose to do?
I'm really sick of it. soo sick... of waiting.
I dont even know what i'm waiting for..
and if y'all think this is Emotional, than F U .
Cos its my blog and its suppose to be personal.
If u wanna judge than say it to my face, dont gossip!
ahahax...
Torment..Sacrifice..God..Love..Life..Earth..World..Relationship..Friendship..Depression..Self-harm..Myself..You..Everyone..Hate..Disappointment..Unreliable..Insecure..Unsafe.....Broken... Dead... Empty...
Why'd you have to leave me falling down this bottomless pit? I'm an angel, I'm suppose to sore in the skies, free, with no chains, no limits.. Not falling with burned off wings and broken bones..
.:FORSAKEN:.
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