Reality Check!

You're not special, nor unique, nor extraordinary. You're just human. Only Human. Perfection does not run through the veins of people from birth, it does not grow with time either. It is a characteristic.. an attitude.. that can only be achieve via hard work, desire and dedication. And as far as I'm concerned, my only goal in life is to achieve that Perfection. Although, not in its every form. But in the form of Arts; every form of arts in Perfection. Thats my life goal, to express the beauty in the ultimate expression of self; Art. be it an animation, a 3D design, 2D design, 4D design, Virtual Reality, Sketches, Painting or even in the form of words. I wish to bring forth a new age and open the eyes of creativity hidden in the minds of the most imaginary visionaries. I've set my mark, and working towards it. :)


and in other news... i know i've posted this before, but the thought has just sinked into me more within the month. Church leadership. heh! I for sure dont think I can do it. Oh hell! i cant even take care of myself and God knows my spiritual life is a rollercoaster. I aint perfect in spirit. But... he stroke me down with the urge to take up sure responsibility. and i dont know if I should. ahahax, ahh! actually i think i shouldnt, ehehe~ an imbalanced person like me would drive my members crazy if not crazier than they already shud be. But than it might be a fun experience even if i fail at it. :O gahh, shud i take the chance? WILL I MAKE A GOOD LEADER?

"A truly good king should serve his people rather than demand to be served"



another random thought is wondering if i should try teaching Arts tuition. ahahahax. I may not be the best artist, but i can definitely express concept that can release one's imagination to a whole new level. Beyond what science can ever explain. Should I?
gahhh yes, i've been thinking alot lately.. At any rate. Passed up all my assignments last friday. so now I'm freeeeee for the semester :D yay! except marketing exam. pffttt~ Then i'm off to KL wooo! shopping! :X ahahax.. :)

okay so i havent been that great lately.
Been overthinking lately. oh hell, been crying abit too. ehehe
A part of me thinks i should go back to how I was before, and lock myself in a mentally built wall. That would keep everyone in society out when I find peace in solitude..
A part of me think i should step out even more and embrace that of which I once hated most.... people... hmmmm~ decisions, decisions...

People are a constant pain that I can really do without sometimes..
but on the contrary they can be the one thing to save me from complete damnation. ehehe. what ever should I do? D:
I found my peace in solitude... :| but i know clearly that it isnt the will of God. ahaha... My will to lock myself in a fog of darkness shrouded from the world that is here... Argh, yes I've been overthinking alot. still am. I just dont see what the world can show me besides imperfection, and yet its those imperfections that makes it unique to watch. Still a life without them would bring forth to me an illusion of perfection in my own imagination.
Oh dear God~~ :( what's wrong with me?

I have alot of decisions to make, and I gotta make them soon, or else I'd be stuck in a whole lot of confusion again. :( and tats bad for my future plans.

Oh yeah! heard lotsa cool story lately and i'd like to say;
stop telling me about people killing people/committing suicide over relationships. i'm not interested in knowing stories like that. (like theres one about some Indian guy liking a girl, but the girls family dont allow their relationship, and he got angry went to the girl's school and chop her head off with their Indian hook knife right in front of all the students there... ewwwww much? LINK TO REPORT) LOL i have the most awesome mum ever, cos she always tells me this kinda stuff. effects of reading too much Stephen King i guess. ahahax. but then I cant say that they're not interesting, its just that I rather not know some of the reasons why things like dat happen. I'd rather just know the; student cutting another student's head off part. :\ Just too much drama when u add in the problems and reasons.




& In other news
I've grown to have a certain love for blades.. no not katana, no not actually blade blades. more like daggers and switchblades. and also Kataras/Katar Daggers. at any rate, i think i might buy some as some sick new hobby of mine. pfft! MAYBE. lol, then again it might just be another thing to waste my cash on. ahahahas :B
That said;



Animes!



Rewatched True Tears (it still makes me cry at the end!) It just keeps making me wish i could have a relationship like that, despite the not so happily ever after part.




I also watched; Blade Of The Immortal
lotsa sick samurais and warriors in there; Like one crazy samurai who cant stand seeing beautiful women die, so he would like kill them; preserved their body (like mummy ointment!) and cut their upper body off and sew the neck and head into his shoulders. Ewwww~ psycho! And for him its like; Death is the only thing eternal thing in life... Unfortunately the main character is an Immortal not bound by death. which made that guy go crazy gaga being totally unhappy that his vision of Death being eternal is actually false. pfft!





I also rewatched well... .Hack//Sign
Cos its just one of the most epic animes I've ever seen (excluding FMA of course) I guess cos its this anime that made me wanna become a multimedia artist in the first place. ehehe... It may be old, and may not have any special effects or 3D animation. And it doesnt even have much Action in it. its more of a confused mindtwisting anime, that makes one well.. Think. And the creator is just soo damn creative. So yeah... still my fav anime of all time. CLASSIC :D



Watched also Asura Cryin'
its interesting.. Its about Rosen Bridges bringing forth a gate way to the Asura world, where Asura Machina are able to travel through them.. But the only way for people to control one in the real world, is to sacrifice a person for it. to become the lifeforce for the being. Its very interesting. How being friends with a ghost can allow one to control a huge gaint another dimension death-like robot. LOL!



There's also KARAS,
Its a very interesting OVA, as its like a 3D and anime version of Kamen rider/ultraman/power ranger. watever those kind of shows were back in the 90s. now KARAS however is more dark and sinister and since its in anime form, its more gruesome, with blood spilling all over and demons and death taht sucks people's body, it makes the show more epic than it should be... But i only watched 2episodes of it, out of the 6episodes. ahahas. I dont think I'd watch it tho, aint really my type of anime.

anyway, went to watch Thor with Feng and Ric just now. :)
Feng also brought his cousin out too. :) I forgot his name. LOL!
at any rate. Thor was interesting... tho it wasnt the movie i wanted to watch most within this and last month. But still it was okay... 7/10 for me. Taking in its genre and style. But all there is were special effects, if it werent for the special effects it wouldnt score a 7/10. cos the storyline is just LAME. So as far as superhero movies go. The Dark Knight was and will be my top fav. thanks to The Joker :) but dont knock Thor out of the watchlist, cos if u like Comic book heroes than sureee you'd love the movie too. And it also have a hidden trailer after the credits so yeahhh~
Anyway! going to cinema again within this week. ehehe cant wait :D gonna watch Red Riding Hood (FINALLY?!?! :X)


Uhmmm, I think thats pretty much it for this random update...
Uhmm yeah! peace n love :)