Light your own path

Words for you I'd never say.

Care towards you, you'd never know.

Love for you, you'd will never understand.

Reasons to give and the reasons to hold.

Hopes forgotten, by the dwindling faith of the soul.

Forward you go or backward you slide.

Stuck in this hole of self pity will be your demise.

Fear of emotions and fear of the world.
Will bind you to this forever my dear.

So why wont you step out before it's too late,

All you have to do is follow the light.

And it will lead you to a place where everything'll be alright.

Fragments of darkness

I seem to have found myself losing fragments of time..

Alas its the final week before the end of February.

It's as if the time flew by without me noticing.

I spent the CNY at my bro's new house, which was interesting to say the least.

But as usual being 11years of age apart makes my conversation with him feels stale..

I guess we just have different way of thinking, different way of life.

That aside, I quit-ed my semi-part-time-job..

due to having to start my internship in another company next month.

oh well, at least I received a bonus. aha!

I guess there isn't much for me to say really..

I've just been dragging on my life day by day,

and at this point in life, I'm stuck wondering what i'm doing..

and is the future I'm aiming for, the right future?

will it be fruitful? and would I be able to stick to it till the end without falter?

I'm losing time but there just isn't anything for me to put down..

Life has slowly becoming dull to me as I reach into the dark veil of adulthood.

It's the year I'll turn 21.. :\

- The Engulfing Darkness-

No.. I do not wish to grow old.

Not now.. I wanna be young,
I wanna be free, I wanna be eternal.

This world, I feel is not the world I've hoped to be in..

It has lost it's spark, it's marvel, it's reason to exist..

All the mysteries and wonders of the past are lost in a time long gone..

The future is now, the future is near..

and I dread it so..

Technology's advancement would ultimately be the end of the human race.

And as much as I know I would be part of the advancement..

I do not wish to be so..

I wish to live in a time.. a simpler time..
where all people wanted to do was to survive..

Not a materialized world where people no longer value life..

Not a world where people dont even have the decency or intellect to understand;

that once you're dead..
none of these material things and technology is gonna save you nor go with you into the afterlife.

The world now is no longer shrouded in darkness..

The world has already taken the darkness within them..

It's a time when people embrace the dark, the pain, the suffering..

A time when rebellions and physical war has no limits nor meaning.

Death would be at a rise and people just wont care..

A selfish world where everyone believe their own cause to be righteous..

A world engulfed in darkness, with no savior..

This is the future.. I'm imagined it, I've dreamed it.. I've seen it.

It is inevitable.. unavoidable..

and I am forced to play my part in it..

Oh to be able to see the ending days of the human species..

It's breathtaking.. and oh so.. depressing..

It's a future I do not wish to face..

I'd rather be living the dark ages of knights and crusades..

a time when people can actually choose their own sins.. their own fates.

and not be condemned along with the entire planet.

or in the time of 1800-1900s,

when the darkness was but in the emotions and dreaded souls of writers and poets.

And wars that shape the countries and nations to build the world we have today..

All those people in the past shaped the world into it's perfect state..

and all our generation does is condemned it and destroyed it..

with technology and greed..

It is clear that the darkness that was once unseen..
has made it's way to the souls of our race..

and now to the hearts and spirit of the world..

There's no longer any hope..

and I'm just forced to drag my life on.

on and on it goes...

and when the it stops.. everything stops..

I'll just have to make it on my own..

and hope the world sees it's error before its too late..

I'll end my rambling with the Sith Empire (star wars) teachings..

"Peace is a lie. There is only Passion.

Through Passion, I gain Strength.

Through Strength, I gain Power.

Through Power, I gain Victory.

And through Victory, My chains are broken."

I will defeat this dark demon.

even if the world is condemned for their sins.

I will arise victorious against this dark times.

Valentines Day

Its Officially Valentine's Day and though it'll just another normal day for me.
I cant help but feel loved. Even though I wont be spending it with her, it seems fine really.
I mean when the time comes, I'm sure we'd be spending loads of time together. ^^
And besides, all in all she is still an amazing, lovely, cute and kind person :)
anyway I posted her gift on facebook..
Though I still wish I could do more :S

Anyway, this was the gift I gave Ayu-chan ♥ ♥ ♥

with a short poem as well;

Although we're worlds apart.
I still love you with all my heart.
I may not be able to give u a proper gift this Valentine.
And even if this relationship takes time.
I just want you to know that I'm happy you're willing to be mine.
It isn't my best artwork, I hope that's fine.
It was done with only the thought of you on my mind.
Art is all i know, I hope you dont mind.
Whatever the case, Will You Be My Valentine? ♥


♥~ 大好きだよ。~♥

No matter what, I really feel great ^_^
Despite everything, I just feel really.... happy..
I hope she is too ~_~
uhmm yeah! so no plans today..
bahh~ either way, my playlist for today would be all "Poema" songs
Cos I'm just in that lovey dovey mood right now!

uhmm yeah. I know I'm crazy ^^

Valentines day, although originally it was only a day to celebrate St.Valentine's sacrifice and dedication towards the poor and needy. Has over the years became well.. a couple's day. But then I dont really care, I'll still use this day to be thankful of the people that's been in my life over the years. No matter good or bad. Every event, every person that's been in my life has impacted me into becoming who I am today.. and I'm thankful for that. ^^

And then i guess that's it..

Happy Valentines Day Everyone ^^

Raindrops

Sometimes, people are like raindrops.
Millions of them passing us by.
Reaching a sudden stop.
The Sun appears.
Raindrops, Puddles.
Evaporates. and gone forever.
So for every raindrop that touch your skin,
Feel them, Cherish them, Embrace them.
Cos' nobody know when the sun will come out.
And take away these amazing droplets from you.

Movies & Expression :)

Just finished watching a 2009 Japanese Movie;

I Give You My First LoveIts a very nice and sweet 2hr movie :)
Romance of course. and I can honestly say;
I'm seriously loving Japanese Romance over Western and Chinese Romance.
ahahax~ cos its more.. realistic? and cute! and well just emotional.
and people think Japanese people are suppose to be stiff.
ahahax. As always..
The main character is a sick guy and his life will end soon and his love life wont last long.
well yeah! thats always the dilemma.
I think if Calculated 8 out of every 10 Japanese Romance movie made
are of the main character having some incurable disease..
So does this story have a happy ending? watch for yourself! XD
So this one is abit nicer, as the story starts from his childhood.
All the way up to being a teenager :)
Overall rating I give it;

8/10
Great Acting :D~ and Good storyline :)~
Even the kids that acting in the early part of the movie :)

Another movie I'd like to share is;
.My Rainy Days.

Its also a 2009 release :) also Romance.
With a good storyline. This main male character has a brain disorder.
So he gets more n more forgetful each day...
This one i give the score of
9/10
cos the storyline is slightly better. and the characters are more defined.
Although I seldom see teacher dating student -__-!
anyway! yeah!
This is a great movie.
Its quite similar to the Chinese Movie

.A Beautiful Life.Cos that movie had a main male character with the same disease as this japanese movie.

and that the chinese one is more grown-up and serious, and slightly more sad.
Acting-wise I prefer My Rainy Days :)
My beautiful life scores a 8.7/10 for me

So yeah! I loveee asian Romance movies. as compared to western ones.
Cos the asian movies are more emotional and dramatic.
so I'ma gonna keep downloading and watching them this entire raya week!
Since I have nothing better to do~ ROFL!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------


.The Scream by Edvard Munch.

! EXPRESSIONISM !
Expressionism was a modernist movement, initially in poetry and painting

-----------------------------------------------------

Ignoring that~!
Its been soo long since I last posted anything super emotional in my blog.. (okay not really long)
But yeahh~ :)

First off I believe that...
But the real question I have now is.
I'm wondering that especially since;

So I'm wondering now,
Should I give to you this fragile heart of mine?
Knowing well the pain that might comes with this decision?



---------------------------------------------------------
I'll Take A Risk, Take A Chance, Make A Change & Breakaway

Held A Little Too Tight

Ever feel like your life is hanging by a thread?
As if it was the only thing left for you to hold onto, if not you'd fall?
Well.. Experience has taught me holding too tight ain't the best option.
It seems as when you grow tired and weary, you'd begin to slip.
Eventually you'd lose your grip and get massive rope burns before as you fall slowly to rock bottom.
Letting go would have been a better option. But well, being human.
It seems we're always too prideful of ourselves and never wanting to let anything go.
That said,
Although these emotional scars may take a long time to heal.
There's something special about being at Rock bottom.
What is it?
A Solid Rock for which i lay down upon. Grieving my lost. Healing from the fall.
Perhaps one day I'd find the strength to reach the sky again?
Perhaps it would be a thread of a different kind that would lead me to the stars?
Whatever it may be, one day I shall reach the top of the earth.
For now, I shall rest and let the wounds heal.
Thanks you, for being my comfort.
Thank you, my sweet Solid Rock.

Aftermath

So, I met a "friend" on fb. He isnt the kind person I'd thought to ever be friends with.
But seeing from his viewpoint I can understand. Still. He's an ass. But a very poetic one at that. So Jasper. here is a lame, long and overall not that great reply to your poem, cos I have no idea how to comment your poetry. ROFL!



Aftermath of The War

The Time of War Has Come And Passed.
Now, All That's Left Here Are But Dust,
Uncertain Of How Many Have Left.
Unsure Of Those Who Remain.
Buried Under The Soils The Remains Of The Past.
Things Never Seen Again, Things That Never Lasted.
All Have Gone But Their Sacrifice And Memories Remain.

No Hope For The Dead And Gone,
But Their Sacrifice And Bloodshed Will Never Be Forgotten.
Little It May Seem For Those Who Sacrificed,
For A New World Yet Unseen.
Hopeless It May Feel, When Sufferings Remain.
Faithlessness May Come, To Those Who Remain.

Death Of Thousands, For The Safety Of Hundreds.
Justice Served Tho Those Who Dwell In War And Anger.
Sacrifices Given, Suffering Everlasting.
No Hope Left For The People Who Wait To See Peace.
No Hope To Those Cursed To The Blade Of Death.
But Strength Comes From Those Who Oppose.
Power Comes To Those Left With Strength And Beliefs.
When The Time Of War Has Ceased.
There Is No Peace To Be Found.

In Sufferings; Endurance, Strength And Life Is Given.
To Those Who Suffer And To Those Who Have Fallen.
Find Courage For A Final Stand.
For The Dead Has Tried. And So Shall We.
To Take What Is Ours.
Peace Or War, Let It Be.
We've Lost All That Can Be Lost.
We've Given All We Have To Gave.
If We Fall So Shall It Be.Let Our Final Stand Be Clear.
And For What Is To Come, We Shall Show No Fear.

Peace? War? It Matters Not Now.
For We Fight For What We Believe In To Be True.
We Fight For Our Loved Ones. And Protect Them From Those Who Invade.
Forgiveness Cannot Be Given By Any Mortal Man. But By The Creator Himself.
There Is No Peace In War. Nor Honor In Murders.
But Is It Not Wise To Fight When All You Have Is Taken,
And All Life From Your Bones Have Been Stripped?
To Fight For Protection Of Others And For A Better Future Yet Unseen?
Death Means Nothing To Those Who Have Lost Everything.
To Those Whose Sacrifice Shape A Future Everlasting.