Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Neutral?




"The choices are always in your hand,
And only by making the choice, Will you free your hand to grasp the opportunity."






Haixxx~
So its been a long day.
pahahax. started playing a new online game. the game is kinda old tho.
Its called Rohan, the only reason i play it?
cos I get to play as an assassin.
Most multiplayer Role-playing games are party/group based.
where u play the good guys fighting against monsters and the evil ones.
watever, but this one is splited into different races.
and altho all of them do the whole good vs evil thing.

The Dhan assassins stands out as u can play them as a normal character.
or use him/her to kill other players to gain exp. to level up. blah.
Altho the character is always considered an enemy,
it's well fun for me. ahahax,
nothing says fun, then pissing people off by killing them when they're fighting evil :D
so yeahhh~~ I guess i like having the free will of playing the character.
yeahhh. ahahax.. I love assassins! :\
~Dont Trust Me~ LOL!


anyway..
Finished most of my work..
Here's My HEXagon.
yes, its a freakin HEXagon. if i had to name the work;
it'd be called; Pendora's Box.
LOL! cos it's soo Eeeebil! bwahahahaha

Top:
(the night shall come, and the moon shall glow; a new age to come, a new dawn for growth)
Side 1:
(Darkness shall fall from the heaven, like death's Golden descending)
Side 2:
(the Earth shall divide, with the end's coming)
Side 3:
(the sins of man shall bear witness to their own doing)
Side 4:
(The one in darkness shall smile at man's undoing)
Side 5:
(The world will be ripped and torn, life shall taken by death, darkness shall overwhelm the light)

Side 6:
(And all we do.. all we do, is bear witness to our own undoing, dying from the sins we commit and love, have our god-given life stripped from us.. knowing, it was by our own choice)



Tadah! my art! LOL! :B yesh its deep. yesh its dark. yesh its goth and emo at the same time.
yesh i know i've changed and shudnt do art like this.
But still it came to me that way. and i love the way it turned out.
ahahax :) Darkness...
It isnt Evil it isnt Good. it be neutral. and thats not bad xD
Even in Revelations God allowed The Messenger Of The End; Death.
to take his role in the end. Its his job i guess, to lead the dead to their judgement.
mehh! tbh, i'm curious on how he looks like. o_o!
is he like the grim reaper, skeleton and all.
or an angel with black wings..
but then why would he be sitting on a horse?
(bible say; death rides on a black horse)
my guess is; he's as unworldly and beautiful as any angel, and altho emotionless, holds beauty in his own way. hah! :x hmmm~ LOL! xD Curiousity about Death..
Damn! I definitely have a problem

Oh well! anyway!
So yeahhh! all i've been doing is assignments.
assignments, assignments!!!
sigh! Ahahahax.
CG meeting tomorrow, cant wait! :DD i need the few hours of relaxation.
and i think that's pretty much it.
:) I choose God.. over death, over myself, over Hell.
Basically, because, I'm still alive.
And it aint death nor hell keeping me alive.
ahahax~ so yeah! x)
I might have always been curious about the darkness and death itself.
But it shall not divert me from the light.
I might love to hide in the darkness once in awhile,
but it doesnt mean i aint praying in it.
So yes, I am emo. yes I am not what i seem.
yes I am not the best. yes i aint perfect.
But when it comes down to it, at least I'm neutral.
ahahax. I may aim to be better, or present myself as something more.
But when it comes down to it, I'm neutral.
And i know most people love me for being the way i am.
ehehe~ :) I love the people around me more n more each day!
even new people i just know! or random friends on fb! ahahahax

so yeahhh.. Overall life is good.
I may not be normal. I may be messed up.
But i love my life... and that means alot to me.
Few years back, I probably could never imagine;
myself, being the way I am today.
the way I walk, talk, sit, stand, present myself.. express and expose myself.
I guess I just never thought life could end up this good for me.

it may still have its flaws, i may still be sad, things may still go wrong, i may still feel alone,
but overall.. I'm still alive.. and that is good..
I can wish and I can hope..
I can want to have happiness in my life.
But when it comes down to it.. I am happy..
I may not be super duper happy till i jump around like a crazy bunny.

But i'm happy...
I'm happy i'm in a loving church.
I'm happy having a lovely group of friends. (you guys are awesome! ahahax! xD)
I'm happy meeting and knowing more n more new people lately.
I'm happy people dont look at me like I'm a freak.
I'm happy that I can live my life, the way I want to.
I may not have what I want.
I may have lost a lot.
I may never find what I want.
I may never have my wish granted.
but that doesnt mean I cant live my life the best way I know how. :)
ahahax. that's it for today.

Peace n Love All.
:) I love you all!